The irony of being understood by others is that it often requires us to understand ourselves first. If you are a mystery to yourself, you will always be a mystery to others.
Sometimes the "void" of not being understood can be partially filled by validating yourself. You don't always need a witness to make your feelings real. Summary Table: Closing the Gap
Expecting someone to "just know" what you need is a setup for disappointment. Even the people who love you most cannot read your mind. 3. How to Make Yourself Understood you_dont_understand_me
Ask them to repeat back what they heard. "Just so I know I'm being clear, what is your takeaway from what I just said?" This catches misinterpretations in real-time. 4. When the Other Person Isn't Listening
"You never listen" puts people on the defensive. The irony of being understood by others is
Some people lack the vocabulary to process complex emotions.
Sometimes, the way two people process the world is fundamentally different. This requires a high level of patience and a "manual" for how to handle each other. 5. Cultivating Self-Understanding You don't always need a witness to make your feelings real
Before fixing the problem, it helps to understand why the "signal" gets lost between the sender and the receiver: